One date, two dates, three dates, four…

How many more dates until I say no more?!

Dating fatigue is not a figment of your imagination. It’s felt on many levels — mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

As you may have guessed today’s blog zeros in how dating is impacting your mental health. Life is difficult enough, but dating shouldn’t be one of them.

Today, you’ll learn the commonality of dating fatigue, the mental impact, and tips to get back on track.

So what makes me an expert?

I’m not… but I am right there with you swiping left and right trying to find someone who can hold a decent conversation.

This is by no means an anti-love, dating app, or dating as a whole rant. The only goal is to provide you with extra tools to keep you mentally at peace during your dating journey.

If you haven’t already make sure you give me a follow and share this blog with anyone who needs it. You’ll find my contact info at the end of the blog.

Let’s get to it 🙂

Dating Fatigue. What Is It?

Psychology Today defines dating fatigue as -

“Dating fatigue might present as an attitude of indifference, feeling depressed and hopeless, exhausted at the thought of another date, or thinking you’re ready to give up”.

Now that you can put a name behind all those heavy feelings and thoughts you’re having let’s explore common questions, symptoms, and how to get back on track.

Psychological effects of online dating?

Dating looks fun, exciting, and filled with endless possibilities.

Dating also looks heavy, overwhelming, discouraging, and exhausting.

Prioritizing your mental wellness is necessary for a positive dating experience. Not only will you be confident with your decisions, but you’ll show up being the best version of yourself.

Endless swiping, filling out profile questions, and finally posting that one perfect photo. You know the photo you took during a fun night out that looks ahhhmazinggg!

With good conversation and common interests with your matches, the endless options of online dating apps will have your imagination creating detailed pictures of what the future holds.

The reality is that many connections made by rapid-fire messaging leading up to the first date create a false sense of emotional intimacy.

Intimacy aside, too much energy spent on dating apps for long periods will impact your self-esteem. The rejection and being ghosted many times will cause self-doubt to mentally take over.

Believe it or not — having what seems to be endless options of photos on dating apps you’re de-personalizing each one of them.

All the great things each person has to offer are based on a series of unfortunate photos picked for their profile.

These key factors are surface level, but all lead to the impact on your mental health while dating. Positive or negative it’s happening.

Times author, Jamie Ducharme wrote an in-depth piece on this that I highly recommend checking out.

How Do I Protect My Mental Health While Dating?

Now that we’ve talked about mental wellness let’s get into expectations and protecting your energy.

Time and Energy⏳ = Currency 💸

And with this inflation that can’t go to waste!

Creating intentional and realistic expectations for yourself maintains a healthy perspective.

For so many, constant communication with rapid-fire texting is a sure way that this is ‘the one’ leaving all the other prospects ghosted because you’re comparing what one person is doing most vs. the others in your inbox.

Don’t let yourself get blindsided by this or similar actions. One person’s availability doesn’t lead to higher odds of dating success.

Take these common expectations -

👉🏼 Anticipating a certain outcome

👉🏼 Envisioning in your mind exactly how things will work out

👉🏼 Going into it with a set idea of what you want and what you need from the situation

Expectations will make your fairytale love story more difficult to find. Hold yourself accountable by dropping the ideas and notions.

A fantastic article published by Verywellmind goes deeper into expectations vs. reality traps…

Need I say more??

Okay, yes, I will ⬇️

Personal experience has led me through countless rabbit holes building deep behind-the-screen romance and emotional fantasies that ended just as quickly as it started.

Dating Basic Tip #1: Be excited throughout the process, but don’t stop living your best life. Don’t stop prioritizing yourself, friends, and family because you may have found the one after messages and the first date.

What’s meant to be for you will be — Trust and believe that!

5 Ways to Cope With Dating Fatigue

Who would’ve ever thought that this would be a thing? I sure didn’t, until I experienced the symptoms firsthand.

Dating fatigue doesn’t mean permanently hitting the pause button on your dating life, but there is nothing wrong with taking a break, if you need it. Many dating apps now offer a pause button so you can come and go as needed.

Fatigue puts you in a negative mindset, tired, moody, irritable, and discouraged.

Would you want to date yourself in this state of mind?

Fear not my romance-seeking reader we are going to overcome dating fatigue together.

1️⃣ Expectations: I can’t stress enough the importance of setting realistic expectations for your sanity when dating. This can be a daunting task for some, uncomfortable, or feel it’s unnecessary — but if you haven’t had much dating success I highly recommend giving it a try.

2️⃣ Not Taking Things Personally: You’re unique, one of a kind, and can’t be duplicated. Because of this… You’re not created for everyone nor should you want to be.

You deserve to be appreciated by the right person. Rejection is difficult and it will have you thinking that the issue is ‘you’ — It isn’t. Some things aren’t meant to work out and the sooner you’re able to accept that the smoother your dating experience will be.

Rejections are simply redirections in life! 🎯

3️⃣ Dating Skills Refresher: There are so many free resources at your fingertips. Many of those who specialize in dating offer tips and tricks to successfully navigate the dating world. I recommend YouTube videos or following dating coaches on social media.

4️⃣ Openminded to Change: No one has fun running in circles. The same goes for only dating people that fit your type — It doesn’t lead to a positive ending. Breaking the cycle of a type is crucial to opening your mind and heart.

5️⃣ Having a Life: If actively dating and finding a partner is important then it should be a priority for you… A healthy priority. You can’t lose yourself in the process.

Jepordizing what makes you happy and energetic must be protected at all costs. Your future partner should add to your life not put you in a position to sacrifice what makes you special.

Whether you’re diving into the dating pond, a dating pro, or simply curious these 5 easy to follow tips will keep you mentally on the right track and avoid dating fatigue all around.

When Should You Bring up Mental Health When Dating?

There is no shame in — 🙅🏻‍♀️

➡️ Taking care of your mental health and wellbeing

➡️ Sharing your mental wellness journey and experiences

➡️ Being open with details surrounding your mental health

You’re in charge of what you decide to share with others about your mental health. There is no right or wrong way to approach this.

National Alliance on Mental Illness aka NAMI recommends approaching the topic when you are comfortable. Focus on yourself in this moment.

Key takeaways from NAMI’s blog post are to make sure you feel comfortable with the person, you feel okay and not pressured, if you need to ask for support, if they disclose any of their issues, or if the question is asked.

I can’t recommend enough taking a few minutes to read the blog for great pointers on this topic.

Long story short…

Dating like anything, is what you make it to be.🌠

Following these practical tips, you’ll have a more positive dating experience while prioritizing your mental health and wellness.

I wish you the absolute best on your voyage to find what you’re looking for.

Let’s Not Forget…

Make sure to follow my Medium account for more relatable personal wellness blogs. 🔔

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